Thursday, April 18, 2013

Online Dating: Dealing with Failure


Dating in the real world comes with the usual frustrations and heartache; online dating presents a different set of challenges and disappointments, even pain. When dating across cultures, the risks for failure are even greater. Those with genuine and honest intentions of finding their life partner through cross-cultural online dating, however, are often ready and willing to take on the difficulties that might come their way; many who succeed do so because they are equipped with the right mindset to deal with failure.

Failure to Connect

Experiencing failure on the outset of one's quest can quickly defeat a person and significantly weaken their resolve. If you, for example, fail to get much attention or none at all from other members of a dating site, you should not let any degree of self-doubt or thoughts that you may not be good enough make you want to give up.

Even when you manage to initiate a few connections but fail to sustain the interest of those you are communicating with, you should not question yourself and your reasons for taking this path. You, certainly should not consider quitting altogether.

If there is failure to connect, you should ask yourself if, perhaps, a different approach may be all you need to get the results you want. Maybe you simply need to use a better photo of yourself; or you can try making your profile description more appealing by adding a few amusing or interesting facts about yourself. More importantly, be patient and keep pushing on; sometimes, making a real connection with someone or a few individuals just takes time. At the same time, it will not hurt to make improvements and constantly update your profile.

Failure to Follow Through

Cross-cultural dating online can be quite intimidating at times, mostly because you may feel that you do not know enough about the other culture to successfully form a connection with a person from that culture. For others, it may be because they do not feel capable of taking on the bigger challenges that lay ahead once they have formed a connection with another.

Especially if you are new to cross-cultural online dating, you must realize that it is a learning process and you must be ready to go through a lot of trial and error. Even when you finally figure out an effective dating strategy and successfully connect with a potential partner, you should also be aware that the connection may still fail.

Knowing this beforehand should be an opportunity for you to better prepare yourself and to adjust your expectations. You have to have the resolve to follow through with your quest and to keep pursuing your goals regardless of the frustrations you may encounter. You will really only have failed if you quit. As long as your heart is in the right place and as long as you know what you want, you must keep moving forward. Remind yourself that the only way that you are not going to get closer to your goal is if you stop or take a step back.

Failure to Trust

Always remind yourself that as long as your intentions are good and as long as you are willing to make changes and sacrifices to make a cross-cultural relationship work, then you will find the ideal partner that you are looking for, sooner or later.

Despite the failures, disappointments, and heartaches, you must always trust that the love of your life is out there waiting for you. You must keep hoping that you will have the ideal relationship you have always dreamed of. You must believe that through patience, perseverance, and honest intentions, you will soon find the love you deserve.

Discover tons of great information about online dating and cross-cultural relationships on the blogs, magazine and forum of ChinaLoveMatch.net (the home of trusted Chinese dating), where international men and Chinese women share their life experiences and bare their souls to give you the real goods on love, relationships, and all things virtual, cross-cultural, and Chinese.

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