Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Online Dating: Marrying for the Right Reasons

There are those who engage in online dating for fun, and there are those who honestly believe that online dating offers invaluable avenues that can lead one to finding a lifetime partner. Not everyone, however, has the right reasons for wanting to get married. Not everyone even realize if they are ready for such a commitment. Are your reasons good enough?

Marriage is a huge commitment; getting married is a very big, grown-up step. Unfortunately, not many make the right choice when they get married; they marry the wrong person, marry for the wrong reasons, or marry at the wrong time. A lot of times, all three reasons come together. Marrying for love, of course, is probably the best reason to get married; and when you marry for love, you can be sure it's with the right person and you know when it's the right time.

For some, marriage is a solution to a problem; but there are also those who see marriage as a lifetime pact between two people who love each other and promise to stay committed to each other no matter what.

Are you simply being pressured into marrying the next suitable partner that comes along because your clock is ticking? Are you only trying to fulfill an obligation? Is marriage a way out of a desperate situation? Or do you just need someone to give you security and to take care of all your needs?

Those who are only trying to find a solution through online dating may or may not be willing and ready to make a lifetime commitment; either way, when they do find a partner, the relationship is often destined for failure from the very beginning. They realize the usefulness of online dating as a means to reach their goal; they push through the obstacles until they meet a suitable partner; and they are even capable of dealing with the challenges of the relationship online and in the real world, as well as after marriage.

Sooner or later, however, most of these relationships still fail because one or both parties eventually accept the fact that they are in the marriage for the wrong reasons and they are no longer willing to do what it takes to make the relationship work. Whether or not those involved realize the true significance of marriage and the promises that go with it, and even if there was no love lost between them, nobody gets out of the relationship completely unharmed.

On the flip side of the coin, those who have always had the right reasons from the get-go eventually find and keep exactly what they have been looking for. They work hard to reach their goals - love and marriage - and they work even harder to keep them. For these people, failure is not an option; when they finally make that lifetime commitment, they commit to it for a lifetime.

They realize that online dating with the goal of finding and marrying one's true love is not going to be easy; they do not just jump into any relationship that seems to have the most potential. When they do decide to finally take the leap, they do no intend to just ride the waves.

When they meet a potential life mate, they continue putting in the time and effort to make sure the person is the "right one," and when they have ascertained this, they continue putting into the relationship all that they have to make sure it lasts. They appreciate the real meaning of marriage and they take the promises they make to heart. After all, marriage is not merely a short-term solution to a problem; it is the ultimate goal and it is only the beginning to a lifetime of love and happiness.

Online dating with the goal of finding a life partner has the potential to fulfill your dreams if you have the right motivations and honest intentions. If your reasons for wanting to get married are not right, however, you will only be setting up yourself and another person for disappointment and heartache. So be honest with yourself when you consider why you are online looking for a life mate.

Discover tons of great information about online dating and cross-cultural relationships on the blogs, magazine and forum of (the home of safe Chinese dating), where international men and Chinese women share their life experiences and bare their souls to give you the real goods on love, relationships, and all things virtual, cross-cultural, and Chinese.

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